Sunday, October 25, 2009

Hello in There, Little One

Hello in there, Little One! This is what I keep thinking as I try to wrap my brain around the fact that I am pregnant! I got my first BFP a week ago, but it was more of a faint than a fat positive, and proceeded to disappear.
Today I decided to post, after I got my B-er, F-er P.:) This time, the preggo line came out way darker than the control line, and it was the control line that started to disappear, so I don't know what's with me and the disappearing lines.

I am without words when I think about how to post about this. I feel excited, hopeful, happy, and blessed, while at the same time anxious and fearful, to think that there is really life inside of me again. Somehow just a week ago, that concept seemed like such a remote, far away possibility. I've spent the last five months convincing myself, that "no, you are not going to have a baby," and averting my eyes from the infant sections in department stores to protect my heart. Now, all of a sudden, that is no longer the case, and it's time to open my heart to all the wishing, hoping, planning, and dreaming again! It's almost too much to take in! I already love this little one with every fiber of my being, and yet when I try to imagine actually holding a crying baby in my arms in June, I can only tear up, because it still seems like some distant dream. I know this time, it will be a one day at a time journey, as we love our baby every step of the way.

My husband and sons are beyond excited. My youngest son already gave the baby a nickname. After we explained to them the baby was expected in June, he said "Is Baby June gonna come?" So, Baby June it is, until we decide on a name.:) We are praying, hoping, and believing for Baby June to come wiggling and screaming into our lives next summer.


  1. Congratulations, Jess!! I'm glad we'll have each other to lean on during this time. :)

  2. I am beyond excited for YOU!!!!!!! Congrats and I know what you mean about dodging the infant section, but now it is really ok to start hoping and dreaming and praying like crazy! =)

    I will definitely be praying for Baby June!

  3. Congratulations on this new little one!!